The unsingle parent?
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- April
- 3
A few years ago I sat down at my computer and googled “single parent dating.” I had reached a point where I had been a single dad for a couple of years and wanted to try to meet other single parents. As far as I’m concerned, dating is tricky enough without working in the complexities of being a parent. Some people simply don’t want to date you if you have a kid. In fact, I have plenty of friends who won’t date someone who has a child. So my reasoning was to find a social circle of other single parents and not sweat the dating part too much. As it turns out, I did join a group and have friends from there to this day.
But the wider question of dating as a single parent can be daunting. There are scheduling issues because, unless your kids are old enough to stay home alone, you need to find a “free night” for dates. There are the issues of meeting someone who doesn’t have an issue with you being a parent. Some talk a great game, but ultimately have an issue when push comes to shove and your kid takes priority. And if things work out, there’s the issue of introducing your child to the person you’re dating. Add to this the typical issue of finding someone you actually want to date at all.
To me, the solution was to expand my social circle to include more single parents. I found we had so much in common that friendship was easy for the most part. I focused very little on dating, because my belief — which proved true — is that it would follow if all else fell into place. A lot of the issues I encountered with dating as a single parent seemed to be neutralized, because all the major issues I had in the past were much easier to manage: parenting schedules, parenting responsibilities and a slow transition into integrating the children into the relationship if it progressed to that point. We simply tended to be more like-minded on those issues.
Anyway, this is a topic I will continue to address, and I hope there is some input on it. I’ve gotten quite a few comments and emails on it, so I think there will be plenty to discuss. In the meantime — and perhaps to get some of you started — a press release did come my way last week that hits on this topic. Turns out the Theodore D. Young Community Center, 32 Manhattan Ave. in Greenburgh, is hosting a “Dating Strategies for Single Parents Workshop” at 7:30 p.m. on April 13th.
According to the press release, “The goal of this effort is to have regularly scheduled activities which focus on fellowship, networking, and an exchange of information and resources which support singles.” They’re not picking up the phone tonight, so I’ve yet to find out if it’s only for town residents or anyone. Stay tuned. I’ll try to hunt down more events, groups.
This entry was posted
on Tuesday, April 3rd, 2007 at 6:50 pm by Jorge Fitz-Gibbon.
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I just found your articles by accident and am very interested on this fridays event and am waiting for info. on other related events. Plus, love your articles and the topics. I will be a loyal reader from now on. I did not know that there were events and places to talk, in Westchester, regarding finding love as a single parent.
Thank You.
Doris;
Thanks for reading and thanks for your reply. I hadn’t delved into the single parent dating world until now, but I know it’s going to generate a lot of commentary and interest. It really is one of the more pressing issues for a lot of single parents. I hope I do the issue justice.
Also, I posted more info and a link on a more recent post here, if you hadn’t had a chance to see it yet.
Thanks again.
I personally think that one should gain as much information and knowledge as possible on this topic. Here is another page that may be of interest to some, it’s all about this subject of being a single parent, check it here http://www.parenting-education-rights.com/index.php