Raising kids isn’tÃ‚Â easy. It’s even harder when they’re not yours.
And there are two distinct sides to the dynamic: Your child and your partner’s child.
Yours: You have to learn to relinquish control, and allow that your partner is going to be in a parenting role with your child Ã¢â‚¬â€ regardless of how subtly you introduce them to the role. This has admittedly been hard for me, only because my son and I had been alone for so many years and established, not only a strong bond, but a set of rules that revolved around the two of us. I’m learning.
Partner’s: This is not your biological child, and he has a father. Yet, you are in a parenting role, again, regardless of how slowly you enter into it. This is a tough balancing act for me, because I want my girlfriend’s son to continue to like me and accept me. But I also have to adhere to the rules set out for him, and correct misconduct when it’s necessary. I’m trying to find that balance.
Well, here are “some things to keep in mind,”:http://www.kidsfirstinternet.org/infostepparentyounger.htm from a link that was forwarded to me. But it’s also a “gut” thing, and you have to work with your partner to ensure all the kids in the home Ã¢â‚¬â€ biological kids and stepkids alike Ã¢â‚¬â€ feel that the rules apply evenly to them. We’re working on that balance as well.
Because if you’re trying to build a blended family, you have to accept that they really are yours after all.