Comments on: Who is having the play date? http://parentsplace.lohudblogs.com/2008/02/12/who-is-having-the-play-date/ Mon, 23 Nov 2009 13:26:42 -0800 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Francine http://parentsplace.lohudblogs.com/2008/02/12/who-is-having-the-play-date/comment-page-1/#comment-7980 Francine Sat, 31 Jan 2009 21:55:13 +0000 http://parentsplace.lohudblogs.com/2008/02/12/who-is-having-the-play-date/#comment-7980 My confession is not exactly what you asked for but nonet-the-less...I found your entry while looking up ideas for a single mom's club I'm trying to start up. I'm a university counselor and over the years I've developed my favorite student relationships. After years of hanging out with my single girlfriends and then a few years of marriage without children, we had Lee. Now Lee is almost year and a half and another one is on the way. I am so bored and lonely! I don't have many friends with kids that I want to spend time with. I miss having best friends. And so I recently decided to start having luncheons for whatever reason I can think of. I threw one for some single women/long time acquaintances and next weekend I'll have the former students and their kids over. I thought my motives were pretty selfish until I realized it was not so different than any other playdate. I didn't realize that other people were just as shy, needy and unsure as I am. Thanks for sharing your truest heart. My confession is not exactly what you asked for but nonet-the-less…I found your entry while looking up ideas for a single mom’s club I’m trying to start up. I’m a university counselor and over the years I’ve developed my favorite student relationships.

After years of hanging out with my single girlfriends and then a few years of marriage without children, we had Lee. Now Lee is almost year and a half and another one is on the way. I am so bored and lonely! I don’t have many friends with kids that I want to spend time with. I miss having best friends. And so I recently decided to start having luncheons for whatever reason I can think of. I threw one for some single women/long time acquaintances and next weekend I’ll have the former students and their kids over. I thought my motives were pretty selfish until I realized it was not so different than any other playdate. I didn’t realize that other people were just as shy, needy and unsure as I am. Thanks for sharing your truest heart.

]]> By: Natasha http://parentsplace.lohudblogs.com/2008/02/12/who-is-having-the-play-date/comment-page-1/#comment-7712 Natasha Sat, 07 Jun 2008 20:44:40 +0000 http://parentsplace.lohudblogs.com/2008/02/12/who-is-having-the-play-date/#comment-7712 My daughter is almost two. It took forever for me to ask the neighbour upstairs for a playdate. We haven't set anything up yet but I told her if she was ever interested to let me know. So why am I getting an upset stomach just thinking about the day she will. I'm really shy socially and I'm afraid of being judged by other moms. I know I shouldn't care but it's taking me awhile to get over it. So your not alone out there. My daughter is almost two. It took forever for me to ask the neighbour upstairs for a playdate. We haven’t set anything up yet but I told her if she was ever interested to let me know. So why am I getting an upset stomach just thinking about the day she will. I’m really shy socially and I’m afraid of being judged by other moms. I know I shouldn’t care but it’s taking me awhile to get over it. So your not alone out there.

]]> By: Andrea http://parentsplace.lohudblogs.com/2008/02/12/who-is-having-the-play-date/comment-page-1/#comment-7158 Andrea Sun, 17 Feb 2008 03:15:15 +0000 http://parentsplace.lohudblogs.com/2008/02/12/who-is-having-the-play-date/#comment-7158 My daughter just turned two and while she likes to be around other children, she's still not interacting with them much. At the playground, library, gymclass, etc. I'm always a little nervous to talk to the other moms, but feel it's necessary if I'm ever going to make friends for my daughter (and myself). It seems like the nannies are better at mingling at the parks than the new moms are! Why is that? A brief exchange with another mom at the park is fairly easy, but when it comes to committing to a one-on-one playdate at someone's house, it's a lot tougher. I've decided that meeting other moms is along the lines of "dating" - you have a nice conversation at a playground or maybe the library then decide to set up a play"date" at a public place. If it goes well, then you set up another "date" with the kids, maybe at one of our houses this time. But if by the third "date", the conversation isn't easily flowing between the other mom and myself and the kids aren't interested in one another, then our playdates are over. Time to move on. Fortunately for me at this stage, my daughter is still too young to be requesting to play with any other kids that she met at daycare, so I get to decide which moms and kids we spend time with. I know that won't last much longer. The bottom line is I need to meet other moms that I would be friends with even if we didn't have kids...and that's not easy to find. With infants and toddlers, the playdates are as much for the moms as they are for the kids. So, you ned to find people you're comfortable with. Setting up that first play"date" brings me back to my single days every time. Andrea My daughter just turned two and while she likes to be around other children, she’s still not interacting with them much. At the playground, library, gymclass, etc. I’m always a little nervous to talk to the other moms, but feel it’s necessary if I’m ever going to make friends for my daughter (and myself). It seems like the nannies are better at mingling at the parks than the new moms are! Why is that?

A brief exchange with another mom at the park is fairly easy, but when it comes to committing to a one-on-one playdate at someone’s house, it’s a lot tougher. I’ve decided that meeting other moms is along the lines of “dating” – you have a nice conversation at a playground or maybe the library then decide to set up a play”date” at a public place. If it goes well, then you set up another “date” with the kids, maybe at one of our houses this time. But if by the third “date”, the conversation isn’t easily flowing between the other mom and myself and the kids aren’t interested in one another, then our playdates are over. Time to move on.

Fortunately for me at this stage, my daughter is still too young to be requesting to play with any other kids that she met at daycare, so I get to decide which moms and kids we spend time with. I know that won’t last much longer.

The bottom line is I need to meet other moms that I would be friends with even if we didn’t have kids…and that’s not easy to find. With infants and toddlers, the playdates are as much for the moms as they are for the kids. So, you ned to find people you’re comfortable with. Setting up that first play”date” brings me back to my single days every time.

Andrea

]]>