At least I’m saying so up front, which has to count for something.

Anyway, I did indeed steal this blog entry from one of my favorite single-parent bloggers, Rachel Sarah, who does the “singlemomseeking”:http://singlemomseeking.com/blog blog. In a recent post, Rachel spoke with former “Top Chef”:http://www.bravotv.com/Top_Chef/season/4/index.php contestant Camille Becerra, a single mom who was bounced from the hit cooking show during last season.

“Rachel’s blog post”:http://singlemomseeking.com/blog/2008/04/30/top-chef-and-single-mom-camille-becerra-says-im-dating-myself reveals that Becerra had to give up all contact with her daughter throughout her time on the show, including the little girl’s birthday. That’s an interesting proposition. So, as Rachel asks, is that something you’d be willing to do?

The more I search, the more I find.

As in more single-parenting websites. This is a particularly good one from David Mott, a West Coast dad who runs the “Dad’s House”:http://dadshouseblog.com blog. David is a divorced dad with half-time custody, and addresses everything from solo parenting to the single-parent dating scene and all the issues in between.

He tells me that his goal is to tell the world “that single fathers are perfectly capable of caring for children and running a household solo.” He concedes that his half-custody situation puts him in a different role than solo moms or single parents with full-time custody. But there is plenty of common ground in terms of dating, relationships and parenting concerns. He hits on all those and posts regularly.

“I’m sharing stories and opinions on online dating,” he said. “Also how to deal with things like the general lack of acceptance of a single dad by married couples, and things to do with your alone time. Interestingly enough, my blog has already opened some eyes to married readers who are now re-evaluating the father’s role in a household that has both parents. I’m all for men being more present with their children.”

I’m trying to be selective in the sites I add to my blogroll, and didn’t hesitate adding Dad’s House. The stories are always honest, often funny and consistently useful. And if you noticed, David has already begun providing his input on my posts here, which is valuable to the discussions we engage in.

As I like to say, check it out.

Looking for input on this one.

This is an issue that came up in a friend’s family, and I differ with my girlfriend and others on it. The scenario is this:  A 15-year-old boy was asked to go to the Senior Prom by a senior at the school. The parents know each other and the kid’s a good kid. He’s never been in trouble, very mature and the whole bit. The girl asked him, and he said yes.

Next, he told his mom, who said he could not go because he is too young to go to a Senior Prom. The boy never shared this with the girl, and told her he would be going. When the parents ran into each other, the boy’s mom found out he had not declined as she told him. So, he got grounded and will not be going to the prom either way.

The two issues are this: Is a 15-year-old boy too young to go to a Senior Prom? Secondly, should he have been grounded for defying his mother’s wishes and not telling the girl he wouldn’t be allowed to go? Frankly, I’m not sure how he would’ve pulled it off when the prom day comes around, but perhaps he hoped to convince his mother before then.

For the record, the parent here is in a traditional two-parent home, so it’s not a single-parenting issue. Of course, I always think of these situations as they would apply to single-parent or blended family homes, and I think that adds other potential elements. So, my third question is, does your answer to the first two questions change if I apply the situation to a single-parent household?

Anyway, what do you think?

Somebody’s got to stay home with the kid, right? That’s logical enough. But who misses a day of work?

A study last year by sociologist David Maume at the University of Cincinnati determined that moms are still significantly more likely to stay home than dads. Maume surveyed more than 1,400 parents and determined that 78% of women reported taking time off to stay home with a sick kid, compared to 28% for men. You can “read more about the study”:http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/08/070813162452.htm in Science Daily.

The thing is that the study seems to have looked only at traditional homes, with mom and dad in the house. How does one handle the situation when they’re a single or divorced parent? Needless to say, this is a major problem if you solo parent. Unless there’s family nearby or a support group of some sort, you’re in a bind. And what are the rules on this in a blended family?

This has been on my mind this week because my girlfriend’s little boy has been battling the flu and hasn’t been able to go to his day care. She missed a couple of days, and her ex missed a couple and took him to his sister’s house for the day. Statistically, she ultimately takes more of those days on than her ex does, which seems to fit Maume’s study.

But at some point I wonder what my role is. I normally save my days off for when my son is sick, and juggle those with my ex. Is it my role as a stepparent figure to take off as well when my girlfriend’s son is sick? Or is that a responsibility that falls squarely  — and exclusively — on the little guy’s parents?

In the end I’m thinking gender isn’t all we should be looking at. Frankly, I’m thinking we need a new study.

Sometimes dad needs a helping hand. Well, here it comes, thanks to the United Way of Westchester and Putnam, and Family Services of Westchester. They’re sponsoring the New York Father’s Conference in White Plains on April 26th. It’s long overdue, I say.

The idea is to bring together dads from all walks of life — be they happily married, divorced, single, etc. — for a day-long program to provide advice, guidance and referrals. It features guest speakers that include Hugh Price, a senior fellow at the Brookings Institution and former president of the National Urban League, as well as former NY Jet offensive back Bruce Harper, who is the co-founding director of the youth program “Heroes and Cool Kids.”

Russell Ross, senior vice president of community initiatives for the United Way, told me they’ve had similar conferences elsewhere in the past, including in Rockland County. But this is the first in Westchester County — and he hopes not the last.

“One of the things that we’ve seen in our research and talking to a lot of folks that are working with families is that dads don’t really have an opportunity to interact with each other and learn and kind of share,” he said. “Women and moms, they have their groups.”

Scheduled workshops are to address a number of issues, including wise discipline, balancing work, helping kids succeed in school, and staying connected as a non-custodial parent. You can check out the entire list and get more details “on the United Way link”:http://www.uwwp.org/father.htm for the program.

If you can’t get to a computer, call the United Way at 914-997-6700, ext. 702. But think about checking it out.

With spring break approaching, April is prime time for college hunting. You’ve got juniors in high school checking out colleges for the first time and undecided seniors who want one last look before making the final decision. I know from experience. My oldest son is a high school senior and we visited colleges intermittently from January 2007 to February 2008. Barring a big change, it looks like he’ll go to Stony Brook University, the biggest of the state school’s on Long Island.

With this in mind, I’m passing along some suggestions from the son of a colleague here at The Journal News/LoHud.com, Emily Kratzer. Her son, Russell Voss, who is finishing his junior year at a Hudson Valley college has a fresh take. It also provides a dose of reality for parents.

When you’re around the campuses, no matter what you are trying to find out about the school, keep in mind one simple and over-reaching idea: You will live here for four years. A few things to consider…

What are the dorms like?  Think of it this way: All the time you spend in your house when you’re not in school or at work, you’re going to spend that time in your dorm – with at least one roommate whom you’ve never met.

Dorms are small, smelly places, but some campuses do better than others. Be wary; Some schools squeeze a third student into rooms designed for two. My college says almost all freshman dorms are doubles, but with growing adminissions, most are home to a third student. Also note the location of vending machines, the ratio of bathrooms to people and the like. It doesn’t hurt to check out the bathrooms; you will need them. Look at how they’re laid out. Is there soap? Are there paper towels or blow-driers? Are there individual shower stalls, or is it communal like at the gym? Does it look like it gets cleaned ofen?

What are the school’s security policies? Is there a security guard at the main door of every dorm at certain hours? Do you have to sign in to visit friends in other dorms? My school has a reputation as fairly draconian for requiring students to sign in when they visit other dorms and also leaving by a certain hour. You may not think about it now, but you will spend a lot of late nights talking to people, and you won’t want to be thrown out. This also becomes important if you have friends who like to sneak in cheap domestic beer… not that I endorse that sort of thing… especially if it’s cheap domestic beer.

How close is the nearest chain drug store? The bookstore looks nice, but it’s highway robbery. A nearby drugstore usually will beat the school store on the price of many necessities and it probably has a better selection of ramen and soda. Speaking of soda, a lot of schools sign exclusive contracts with soda companies. My school is a Pepsi campus. Nowhere can you buy Coca-Cola. If soda brand is very important to you, keep an eye out.

How edible is the stuff they’re trying to pass off as food in the cafeteria? Until you move into a dorm with a kitchen, you’ll be forced to eat mass-produced mystery meat for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Some schools are good, others are not. Never ask your tour guide about it, they always say the food is good. The best way to find out is to venture out after the tour and try it.

Where’s the nearest good restaurant? Whether the cafe is good, bad or ugly, you will get tired of it and an affordable restaurant within walking distance is something you’ll pretty much kill for. Bigger colleges tend attract businesses like sandwich shops, casual restaurants, office supply stores, etc. Is there a mall nearby? A movie theatre? You will live at you school for four years; You will want to go off-campus to maintain your sanity.

Finally, a few questions to put your tour guide on the spot:

What nights of the week do people tend to go out to party?
What is the STD rate on campus?
Does the college provide students with condoms?

I’m sure you can think of more good questions.

As the mom of a daughter, I just had to take a moment to share a wonderful and pithy article I read on how pop culture sometimes ignores the potential for female heroes. NPR’s Peter Sagal, the host of the popular program “Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me” explains how in a great commentary. He went to see the new “Horton Hears a Who” movie with his three daughters and came out sputtering with irritation over a new plotline that involves the mayor of Whoville’s son — but ignores the mayor’s 96 daughters.

Here’s a quote from Peter’s essay:

And there’s this — not only does the movie end with father and son embracing, while the 96 daughters are, I guess, playing in a well, somewhere, but the son earns his father’s love by saving the world. Boys get to save the world, and girls get to stand there and say, I knew you could do it. How did they know he could do it? Maybe because they watched every other movie ever made?

We got into the car outside the cinpeplex and I was quite in lather, let me tell you. How come one of the GIRLs didn’t get to save Whoville? I cried.

“Yeah!” said my daughters.

“And while we’re at it, how come a girl doesn’t get to blow up the Death Star! Or send ET home? Or defeat Captain Hook! Or Destroy the Ring of Power!”

How could you forget about your kid? Well, that’s what cops are saying happened in White Plains this weekend.

According to the story filed by my colleague Rich Liebson, city officers spotted a 2-year-old boy sitting alone in the back seat of car on Sunday, then waited. And waited. Ten minutes later, the boy’s 25-year-old dad came back and, when questioned, told officers that “he forgot his son was in the car.”

The guy was charged with endangering the welfare of a child, a misdemeanor, and the kid was turned over to his mom. You can read Rich’s entire story in The Journal News or on “LoHud.com”:http://www.lohud.com/apps/pbcs.dll/frontpage tomorrow.

Obviously, your heart goes out to the kid if the charge is proven to be true. If this is any indication of the father he’s going to have, there’s just some painful times coming for him. To paraphrase the old saying, you need to apply for a license to go fishing, but any screw-up can have a kid for free.

You can only hope the boy’s mom is more on the ball.

My son wants to make it to a Yankee game this year before they shut down the historic Bronx stadium for good and move next door. No problem there. I’m a longtime and avid fan, and took him to his first game there years ago. I myself have been going to games since 1970, when my dad and uncle took us to the old stadium to see the Bombers get demolished by the Orioles. I also had partial season tickets for years, when I worked out of the Bronx County Courthouse during my stint at the Daily News.

Here’s the catch: My son wants to go with just me and his mom — the former family unit.

I have some mixed feelings on this, and it makes for some awkwardness. I’ve always felt fortunate that my ex and I were able to maintain a friendship, and that we are all able to get along. My girlfriend and I had my ex and her husband over for Christmas Eve dinner (it’s a feast we call Noche Buena in Cuban culture, and it’s a big deal for us), and I had Easter brunch with my ex, her family and her husband last month. As I’ve blogged before, we all went trick-or-treating together last year as well.

To be fair, I can see how my son might simply view an outing to a Yankee game as an extension of the friendship his mom and I maintain. But at the same time, I feel like excluding his mom’s husband and his dad’s new partner is a sign that he may be clinging to something. Obviously, he wouldn’t be the first child to want his parents together, even if it is just for a baseball game.

But are we letting him mislead himself if we go along? Or is it just his wish to have an outing with his parents?

Or am I just making too much out of it?

The opening days for New York’s new baseball parks are still a year off, but one thing is obvious when you get past the gorgeous renderings – the stadiums are too small. For the sake of all New York baseball fans, construction needs to stop and new plans drawn up for bigger stadiums.

The people who run the Yankees and the Mets are smart people, so how they came up with these schemes is beyond me. Baseball draws more people every year, while New York City and its suburbs are growing. So what do our baseball teams (with the approval of New York City and state officials) do? They shrink the size of the ball parks.

The new Yankee Stadium will hold about 52,000, down from the current 57,500. The Mets’ new Citi Field will hold 44,000 people compared with Shea Stadium’s 55,700. This is a bad for baseball fans and terrible for parents, kids and grandparents, too.

A baseball stadium is a place where lasting family memories are made. I won’t forget the first time my father took me to the stadium in the Bronx one sweltering August night when I was seven. The Yankees beat the Kansas City Athletics 4-0 in a game that didn’t last two hours. And then there was the first game I took my oldest son to: He chanted “Let’s Go Mets” so loud I feared he had been permanently imprinted a fan of the city’s National League team rather than the Yankees.

Not only will these ball parks have fewer seats, but the ticket prices will be shocking. If you are planning a game or two next year, start saving up by skipping lunch now. A low-cost ticket will go for about  the price of Broadway show ticket.  A top-priced field-level seat at Yankee Stadium will cost $2,500,  about the price of a used car. Ouch.

Don’t get me wrong. The new ball parks look beautiful, especially Citi Field. They will be better places to watch games – much better than the upper deck seats at Shea. Pilots landing at LaGuardia are closer to home plate than my seat near the foul pole a few years ago.

Yankees Chief Operating Officer Lonn Trost recently told our sport writer Sam Borden that the new stadium could have had more seats, but they would have been further from the field. “We didn’t want to do that. We wanted to make sure that each fan had a great view and could truly enjoy the new park as much as possible.”

No disrespect meant, Mr. Trost, but Yankees fans – and Mets fans, too – won’t be able to enjoy their new stadiums if there are too few seats and if the tickets are priced far beyond their means.

Do you think you’ll take your kids to see the Yankees or the Mets as often in their new stadiums? Do you remember first game with a parent, or with your own child? If so, tell us about your memories.