I became a mother almost four years ago in the second half of my 30s. This was long after I had crafted an identity for myself as a newspaperwoman devoted to her career. I wasn’t prepared for how profoundly it would change how I feel about myself and how much I would love it.

Like most working moms, when I was pregnant I anticipated putting my baby into day care after she was born. When the Pumpkin arrived three months early, day care wasn’t an option. I wasn’t allowed to expose her to the potential germs of other children until she reached 15 pounds — a milestone that didn’t come until her first birthday.

I was profoundly blessed to have a wonderful editor, Frank Brill, who knew my diligence and gave me permission to work from home. My most recent editor, Mike Bieger, has also been a supportive and a wonderful mentor. For four years, I’ve worked from home most of the time, covering my beats in business and technology and writing this blog.

While a terrific solution for me, working from home hasn’t been easy. The first year, when I was pumping every two hours, was a blur. Since then, I’ve gotten into a pattern, often getting up at 6 a.m. to write my feature stories while the house is quiet and taking calls well into the evening. I’ve had to say no to my daughter’s pleading for me to play with her more times than I’m happy to remember. But the best part was being around to share her days, to hear the laughter as she played with her grandmother in the other rooms of the house. Crawling, toddling and then running into my home office for hugs, cuddles and to give me “presents” of toys, Cheerios and crayon drawings, she has brightened my life more than any office gossip ever could.

Starting tomorrow, she and I will have a lot more time together. I am one of the 50 employees in the newsroom who has been laid off as our parent company, Gannett, trims expenses to refit the newsroom for the future.

I want to offer my gratitude to my co-workers who have made me feel as connected as I ever did in the office. I want to thank my editors who made my work-life balance a reality. Most of all, I want to thank the readers who have offered me such encouragement over the years. And to the amazing, talented and inspirational parents I’ve met and written about because of this blog, I wish I could give you a big hug. You will not be forgotten by me! If anyone wants to keep in touch, I’m on Twitter (twitter.com/everythingjulie) or you can e-mail me at juliealterio at gmail dot com.

“At work, you think of the children you’ve left at home. At home, you think of the work you’ve left unfinished. Such a struggle is unleashed within yourself, your heart is rent.”  — Golda Meir

“Mama exhorted her children at every opportunity to ‘jump at de sun.’ We might not land on the sun, but at least we would get off the ground.” — Zora Neale Hurston

On Wednesday night, we saw “The Little Mermaid” in New York. It was the Pumpkin’s first-ever Broadway play and it couldn’t have been a better introduction to the experience. Not only does she know the movie very well—having seen it, oh, a dozen times—but the colorful spectacle and cheerful songs were literally dazzling. There was some hiding of the eyes and cuddling up to mommy in the scenes with Ursula, the Sea Witch, but otherwise she was attentive and entranced. I came up with some suggestions based on our experience that might be helpful to other parents pondering whether their child is ready for the Great White Way:

• Pick a play that’s easy for your child to understand, preferably based on a story or movie that’s familiar. The action is fast and the figures on a stage are more abstract than those on a movie screen, so the younger the child, the more of a head-start he or she needs. We actually watched “The Little Mermaid” the day before the play to refresh my daughter’s memory.

• Make sure you have an aisle seat for your child. We were in the orchestra with an aisle seat, which was helpful because Pumpkin was able to see the stage well.

• Arrive early and ask for a booster seat. By the time I noticed an usher passing out booster seats, all the cushioned seats had been taken. We ended up with a plastic seat. It was fine, but a cushion obviously would have been more comfy.

• Try, if you can, to avoid spending money at the merchandise booth on things you can buy in the wider world for less. I was tempted by the cast recording, but daunted by the $25 price tag. Checking at home later, I found the original cast recording on Amazon.com for $14.99. I also managed to avoid spending $15 on a plastic toy “Dinglehopper.” I did, however, find the cost of a nice keepsake T-shirt for my teenage niece was well worth it. If only the children’s sizes hadn’t sold out, I would have bought one for Pumpkin, too.

• Find out what kind of discounts you can get through your work. As a Gannett employee, I saved $30 each on the four tickets I purchased, a $120 savings.

• Reserve a table at a kid-friendly restaurant. We had a 5:45 reservation at Ruby Foo’s on Broadway, just three blocks away from the theater. Energetic and dramatic but not so uptight that a booster seat and children’s menu were out of place, it was an ideal way to relax before the show. There were even training clips for the chopsticks!

• Wait at the stage door afterwards for autographs on your Playbill. The actors were charmed by the adoration of such a tiny young fan, with “King Triton” calling the Pumpkin “Precious.”

• Consider driving in. I know there are many people who hesitate to drive into Manhattan. But we had a great experience. We had a traffic-free and relaxing drive from Northern Westchester along the Saw Mill and Henry Hudson, turning off onto 50th Street and heading to a parking garage on 48th right near 7th. It took us less than an hour. When we stepped out, we had a short walk to the Build-A-Bear store on 5th and then to the restaurant. After the show, it was a short stroll through the bright lights and excitement of Times Square to our car. We left at 11:30 and were home by 12:20 a.m. I can’t imagine how tedious it would have been to schlep to Grand Central, stand around waiting for the train and then sitting on a 70-minute ride. I also found coupons online that cut the parking rate from $37 to $20 for up to 12 hours.

Please share your own Broadway tips and memories!

Not a pleasant thought but a very real one these days.

The truth is unemployment is soaring and the economy continues to sputter. Every job, including our own, is facing looming layoffs and perhaps salary cuts for those that remain.

How the hell to tell the kids?

I have a few friends in this position, and likely will have more soon. One is taking the tact that it’s best not to tell his children until he has to. Another has kept his two kids abreast of developments.

It’s a personal choice, obviously. But I did come across an interesting piece from Business Week magazine that provided some tips on how to broach the subject with the family, and kids in particular.

I hope none of us ever end up in this situation. But life doesn bring twists and turns, and, as is the case with other difficult topics we bring to our children, it’s helpful to have a plan when you go in.

So, hats off to Business Week. Here’s their report:

You lost your job! Should you tell your kids?

Posted by: Mauro Vaisman on September 16

As I read the news today about the thousands of people that are coming to work so they can pack their personal belongings, several things cross my mind—but at the top of the list is: “What is the right way to tell your kids that you just lost your job?”

I did some web research and found an article from 2005 at CareerBuilder.com. Not sure who wrote it, since the byline says only “CareerBuilder blogger” but it has some good advice from Lorie Lewandowski, a counselor for the Mountain Lakes School District in NJ.

Here are some advice from the article:

-Be honest
-Gauge their reaction
-Choose an appropriate time
-Be positive
-Assure them they will be taken care of
-Give them hope
-Watch for behavioral changes
-Let them be a part of your search

Consumer Reports has rounded up an array of back-to-school tips on its health blog. Everything from “eat your veggies” to “wash your hands” gets covered. While you’re there, check out the rest of Consumer Reports’ blogs, which include money, safety and cars. The nonprofit organization, which happens to be in our backyard in Yonkers, is not only a valuable resource, but provides a consumer watchdog service that’s unmatched even by our government.

When we went to see “Wall-E” last summer, my daughter, then 3, cried piteously when Wall-E’s cockroach buddy was left behind as the spaceship blasted off. She was so sensitive—and she loves bugs—that the emotional impact hit her hard. “Wall-E” was rated G.

Being big movie fans, we’ve since taken the Pumpkin to many kids’ movies. And we haven’t had any more tears. I think it’s mostly due to her greater sophistication in responding to filmed entertainment.  We don’t watch much TV at home and the shows she sees don’t have the heightened intensity of a movie. “Planet Earth” DVDs, “Sesame Street” and “Miffy” aren’t exactly edge-of-your-seat entertainment.

But now that she’s used to movies, we don’t necessarily go by the ratings when we determine whether it’s suitable. For instance, “Bolt” and “Madagascar 2” were both rated PG, but neither seemed too scary or intense. We’ve shunned “G-Force,” perhaps unfairly, because I don’t like the idea of weapon packs on cute little animals.

One place a lot of parents go for advice is Common Sense Media, a nonprofit organization that rates everything from movies to TV shows to books to music to Web sites. It’s a good site, and I can recommend it. I do think they are way too conservative when it comes to ratings. For instance, “Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs” and “Up” were both suggested for ages 6 plus. My daughter, who is now 4, loved both of them.

On the opposite end of the age scale, my 17-year-old niece is coming to visit for a few days and we hope to watch a movie with her after the Pumpkin is in bed. We already know we don’t want to watch something with an R rating because we certainly don’t want to confront any sexual scene or foul language. We’ll have to figure out what might be a good compromise on the PG front.

I’d love to hear what other parents do when it comes to ratings. Do you keep your preschoolers away from PG flicks or do you judge each one individually? What’s your strategy for evaluating their worth?

Watching “Coraline” on DVD this past weekend, I cringed and even paused the movie to turn to my husband and say: “I hope that’s not how the Pumpkin sees me.” If you’ve watched the movie, you are familiar with the scene in the beginning when Coraline fails to wrest her mother’s attention from her computer screen. (Warning: If you haven’t seen “Coraline,” stop reading now and go rent it. It was wonderful.)

I was speaking mostly in jest, of course. I’ve never shooed away the Pumpkin so harshly, but I have to admit that there are times when she knows that I’m working on the computer and can’t play with her. Given the amount of indulgence and love my daughter gets in general, I’m not worried about her. But Coraline does make you think about children who aren’t so cosseted and whose parents really do tell them they are too busy to make time for them much of the time.

The evil witch who preys on Coraline’s vulnerability isn’t just a fairy tale creation. There are those who prey on young children by offering them the love and companionship they are missing at home. Just as the “other mother” offers Coraline the homecooked meals and cozy surrounding she craves in hopes of stealing the child away, pedophiles and other criminals can weasel their way into youngsters’ hearts by exploiting their need for love. Children are vulnerable when their parents are absent or uninvolved. Even if they don’t encounter a witch who wants to steal their souls and replace their eyes with buttons, they will encounter peers with dubious morals who might offer the approval they aren’t getting at home.

While cast as a fairy tale (that would earn an R rating if it were a live-action picture)‚ “Coraline” teaches its younger audience about the dangers of believing in something that’s too good to be true. And it provides a reminder to the parents watching that if you aren’t there for your child, someone else (someone scary) might be.

It’s been maybe 12 years since I wrote about Shayna Bryant.

Shayna was tiny, and by the time she died she was painfully emaciated and brutally abused. I was working for the New York Daily News, covering the Bronx County Courthouse, and it fell on me to cover her death.

When crime scene photos were being displayed during pre-trial hearings, I had to walk out of the courtroom. It was the first and only time it happened in my 23 years on the job.

I’ve never forgotten her. Because, on my job, children die, and I have to write about it. It’s never easy. About 15 years ago a friend of mine who was a court officer in the Bronx told me, ‘You must be used to this by now.’ And many have said that to me. The answer is, no, you never get used to it. If it doesn’t affect you, it’s time to call it quits.

Then there was this week.

I happened to draw the weekend shift a week ago today. That’s when Diane Schuler drove the wrong way on the Taconic State Parkway and caused a head-on crash that killed three people from Yonkers and everyone in her minivan except her 5-year-old son, who will, thankfully, recover – at least physically.

Dead in that carnage was Schuler and her 2-year-old daughter, along with her three nieces, the oldest of whom was 8 years old.

How does one cover that? One has to when that is their job.

But it is a unique kind of hell to be immersed in. It’s not nearly the hell of Schuler’s husband, Daniel, who has to raise the only surviving victim of this tragedy with this nightmare always looming over them. It’s not even close to the hell Diane Schuler’s brother, Warren Hance, has to live with after losing all three of his little girls.

Still, it is hellish. And it’s not something you ever get used to.

My prayers are with the Schuler and Hance families tonight, and with the Bastardi and Longo families, whose loved ones also died in that crash one week ago today.

I do recall one conversation I had with a witness to this whole thing last week. She saw it happen, and barely missed being the head-on driver herself. Her name is Katrina, and she had her two kids – a 6 1/2 year old boy and a 4-year-old girl – in the car with her.

When I got home at 1:30 a.m. one week ago, I emailed Katrina and told her one simple thing: Hug your kids especially tight tonight, because you have them.

I did the same with mine.

That’s one hell of a story.

I think every parent and child should do one crazy, ridiculous gigantic project that will be so outrageous that for years and decades later the memory and story will be a family topic. Great for first dates! Q: So what was your family like growing up? A: Well, let me tell you about the time we made a giant loft bed out of “Star Wars”….

And when the kid a month later decides to switch his devotion from “Star Wars” to “Harry Potter,” it’s just more fodder: “My dad nearly killed me when I decided to become a Harry Potter freak. He made me sleep in that bed until I was 17!”

Share your stories of wacky childhood projects!